(OOG: I usually don't do this but..)

((Hi to those of you who've read my blog. I apologize for not really updating it in the last few months. I thought I should explain myself to you, those who've read it, since you deserve to know what's going on:

Been battling mental illness for the last few years, it recently got worse. So bad that I've missed a good chunk of college due to it. As such, I've been unable to update the blog. It's still not going well, but it's better then it's been. I'm going to try my best to get better and get back to writing, since I very much enjoy the Slender-Verse and all it's zaniness.

I apologize again for my abrupt exit.

Much love,

IG: Sebastian, OOG: Kamrian

P.S: If you want to talk, feel free to Facebook message me: www.facebook.com/kamrian.green))

Long time no see

It's me. And I'm still alive.

I do apologize for the massive delay in posting on my end - since the incident with Faceless in Nebraska - which you can read about over on her blog - I've been trying to cut down on using my laptop since, well, you know how that fucker manages to fry technology if he's within close proximity of it.

Though after several months of using this thing for little more then browsing the Internet and following American politics, I decided to give this blogging thing another chance, against my better judgement. Then again, I'm not really well known for using my better judgement now a days; looking back, if I had used real judgement before all this started, I'd never have mentioned to Lillith about Queenston Heights.

As for Faceless and I? Well, she's interesting. I don't feel any hatred for her anymore as I used to. Now a days, she's more or less a kindred spirit. We're both battling against Him for reasons of our own - mine because he wanted me dead, hers because well...she wants him dead - and as such, we're allies now. But more then that, I'm able to talk to her and understand the methods to her madness - once you peel away the psychotic nature of half of her personal blog, you can find out that she's just someone who wants to survive, just like myself.

I'd rather not say where we are at the moment - I'm sure Faceless will when she's good and ready - but we're still waiting for Collector's signal. I personally hope he hurries - I've already seen a few signs that his flunkies are tailing us.

Again, so sorry about the prolonged absence. I'll try to be more frequent with posts.

-Sebastian

Nebraska

Well, Faceless and I are now in the great state of Nebraska. It's another part of the United States I've never been to or even read about, but it seems nice - if fairly rural-looking(then again, I'm a big city kind of guy, so seeing so many small towns is a bit of a shock to the system). We've found our way to a hotel in...well, I'm not sure where - but I'm finally able to get a shower and charge up this laptop. 

Again, I apologize for any silence on our end; it's just been days of driving and talking, mostly. I've been keeping quiet for most of the trip with Faceless, since well, I told her outright that I still don't trust her after the shit she's done with working for The Weaver. It's different with Collector in that he saved my life, but with her - I think I touched on this in an earlier post - I still don't know her, and thus, can't judge her based on what she's doing now. 

I know that must make me seem like a cold-hearted bastard, but look at it from my perspective; I've lost my best friend, my girlfriend, and in general, my life to this bastard and his mindless followers; it's going to be REALLY hard for me to trust someone who used to work for Him if they haven't proven their reliability. 

As for Collector - well, we all know what happened to him. I hope he's able to find us when and if he comes back. I know he says he will, but I don't know, for all of his powers, if he'll be able to come back from death itself again. I could be full of shit and such, of course, but I'm going to approach this with watchful waiting - really, it's all we can do right now. 

I'm going to go grab some food for Faceless and I - I may not trust her, but damn it if I'm going to be a total douchebag to her. I'll try to write again when we touchdown at the next destination we're headed to(wherever that is). 

Sebastian

Still alive

A lot's happened in the last few  days.

I don't have access to my laptop right now and I'm on my  phone so it's hard to write this up. When everything settles down I'll be able to sit down and type this up in full. Needless to say, things are very hectic right now. 

That, and sitting next to someone who I don't trust is still hard to accept. 

The Dream in full

I apologize for posting this later then expected, but I ended up sleeping longer then I wanted; being shaken out of a sound sleep by someone yelling in your ear is not a way I want to get woken up, thank you very much Jack. Needless to say, I was annoyed at him for most of the day - but it was nothing compared to the shit I've been through, so I let it go. After all, he did save my life - so I guess he's entitled to beat me up every now and then. 

Anyway, we're now back on the road, headed towards Maryland. I'm excited, because I've never actually been there - I hear that there's nothing around in the state, that it's pretty desolate, but still - it's somewhere I haven't been and it'll be an adventure, ontop of it! Bonus points to me since that adventure involves The Weaver. 


It took me a while to work up the courage to write this post, but I figure that I promised you folks I'd describe my dream in full, I should honour that promise; I don't really want the reputation of a liar and a two-face to go with the "crazy motherfucker" persona I already have from most of the people I knew back home. 

I was back in some kind of forest. But this time, it wasn't the same as the other dreams I've had - it was just all...black. The trees had no colour, the ground, nothing - it was just...black. Like I was looking at the world through colour-blind eyes. I just remember feeling a sense of panic, and I started running - hard. I mean, I was running so fast that my legs felt as though they were going to break off at any moment. I just knew I had to get away from..something, and that fear was driving me forward. 

I eventually stopped running, when I felt I was safe. I stopped and looked around - I was still in the forest, but now there was a mist that was closing around me. The mist was...wrong. It wasn't regular weather. I tried to get away, but it followed me wherever I went, and blocked my escape. I knew, I just knew - I couldn't walk through it to escape, so I had to stay still. 

And then He showed up. Right on cue, I see the suit and the tentacles come through the mist - not even walking, I remember; almost like he was gliding towards me. He stopped about 5 feet away from me and lifted up one of His...tentacle things, and extended it towards me. It stopped right in front of my face and it curled out - I could see then it was holding something. 

A pen. And the old, leather notebook that Lillith had wrote in. 

I looked up at His no-face again and just remembered shaking my head; I wouldn't do it, I wouldn't give in, I couldn't. 

And then...

Out of nowhere, He smiled. 

I'll never forget the smile as long as I live. It was just so fucking creepy. There's no image that would do it justice, so the best I can do is illustrate it with a bit of keyboard mixing: 

:> 

Sebastian

The Dreams

They're back, and they're getting fucking worse. 

I'm too tired and too scared at the moment to write about them, considering that I just woke up about fifteen minutes ago in a cold sweat. I've told Jack about it, and he doesn't seem the least bit surprised. I hope that this doesn't affect anything that we're doing, but if it does, I'm sure we will find out soon enough. 

I'll write up a detailed explanation in the morning...I really need to try to get at least a few hours of sleep. I can't really do much on 30 minutes or less - I'm not Jack(I swear, he never fucking sleeps). 

Sebastian 

Travelling.

I never really did much travelling before all of this shit went down, but now it's all we're doing. 

Driving and driving and driving. Thank God I bought some Gravol before we left town - carsickness on a trip like this would not be a good thing. I don't think Jack would like me asking him to roll down the windows to throw up every 15 minutes - I figure he'd be more likely to throw me out of the car head first at that rate. 

Anyway, as I write this we're currently stopped at a gas station...somewhere. I still don't know my geography, but right now I'm not too keen on finding out where I am - simply because it'll make me homesick. I still think about my parents and friends I left behind, but then I remember that if I go back, I put them all in danger. I'm committed to this now, and I'm going to see this through, no matter what it takes. 

For the record, my first post in this blog referred to "Collector"; I should clarify now that Jack is Collector, but he told me he prefers the name Jack - and since he saved my life, I felt it was only right I honoured his request. I hope anyone who reads this isn't confused, but now you shouldn't be - Jack and Collector are the same person. 

I do have to laugh because Jack's last post in his blog, Veil of Inquiry, mentioned how I was asking him so many questions and treated him like "the second coming of Christ"; Well, and this is for you, Jack - after all I've been through, it's hard for me not to have so many questions, especially when you seem to know a hell of a lot more then I do.

As for the "second coming" thing, the fact you were able, through some method that I have yet to understand, to make The Weaver disappear by shoving him does make me look in awe of you, somewhat - I will admit that. And shit, it's hard not to. 

Anyway, I'm going to power off my laptop - hopefully we get to a hotel soon because I need to charge it. 

Sebastian